Category: Editorials

The NRA’s Gun Totin’ Weirdos

And besides, who ever heard of sauntering into the old west saloon with a long gun in the first place? Surely you watch TV. In all the westerns I’ve seen, when the cowboy crashes through the swinging saloon doors with a rifle, he’s either looking for the bad buy so he can shoot him, or he is the bad guy and he’s gonna shoot somebody. Either way, he isn’t looking for trouble, he is trouble.

BREAKING NEWS: Yard Abatement Last Straw

The scuttlebutt on the streets is that City and State officials have had it. This mayhem must be stopped! Reports at this time indicate that a contingency of armored vehicles has been commissioned from Redstone Arsenal with backup to arrive from Ft. McClellan within the week. Residents will be asked to move, and if they refuse, their homes will be bulldozed while they are still inside.